better work newsletter #32

📣 Calling all impact-driven women who want to find work that feels meaningful and aligns with their values without losing financial stability or blowing up their lives ➡️ I'm designing a program for you. Join the waitlist here to be the first to know everything.

“Why would I ever pay for coaching services when I get them for free through my company?”

This question came directly from a senior director at a Fortune 500 company after I told her about my career coaching services. She wasn't attacking me or questioning my credibility - she was genuinely curious.

Old me would have frozen. She would’ve over-explained, ultimately fumbling the conversation.

But this version of me didn't do any of those things.

⚔️ Instead, I used my most powerful weapon: curiosity.

I asked her, "Have you ever used that service?"

She shifted in her seat. "Yeah...only a couple of times," she admitted.

I pulled out my second most powerful weapon: silence.

She filled it.

"But they weren't helpful. I stopped going.” She said she got more out of conversations with her therapist, and she had friends and mentors, anyway.

"That's great," I said. "But out of all of those people, your therapist, friends, mentors, who will hold you accountable to the things you said you're going to do? Not just at work, but in your personal life? Who helps you execute those things, even when life gets hard?"

Like most independent high-performers, her answer was: no one.

The common denominator among the people around you is that you have to go to them when you need help.

When you’re overwhelmed, behind, or quietly spiraling, you don’t reach out - you push through.

You tell yourself it’s not that bad. You’ll figure it out. You always do.

What started as a small crack in your foundation starts to splinter and grow over time. You've been through burnout before, and you recognize the signs.

🛑 You refuse to let it happen again.

But avoiding burnout is not a strategy. You need to figure out what kind of life you want to strive for while still living your current one. At this stage of your career, you can't afford to make hard pivots or spend endless hours researching.

My clients and I don't focus on burnout prevention. Rather, we focus on how they want to live.

​That's the difference between running away from something and running towards something.

The value of having someone in your corner who knows you can’t be overstated. Someone who you don't have to re-introduce, re-explain, re-build with. Someone who can help you create a life instead of choosing it.

Therapy vs coaching

If I had a dollar every time someone told me that talking to me felt like therapy, then I would have a lotta dollars.

Coaching can be therapeutic, but it's not a replacement for therapy. And vice versa.

Coaching and therapy sound the same in theory. You speak with a professional who asks thoughtful questions. They give you space to reflect and suggest resources.

You know they're different, but you view them the same when it comes to decision-making for your personal growth.
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Here’s the biggest difference:

→ Therapy offers healing from the past or present.

→ Coaching empowers you to want something different for your future.​
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Therapy helps you zoom in on the "why."
Coaching helps you zoom out to answer the "how."

These are different muscles.

Even with great therapists, you still have to apply what you learned to the nuances of daily life. With a great coach, you have an outsider's perspective who knows your blind spots, who will call you on your bullshit with compassion in real time.

So, is coaching worth it?

Coaching is worth it if you:

• know what you want from coaching,
• believe the investment will pay off in the long-term,
• and trust your coach even when you don't 'get it.'

Coaching is a partnership. Take your time to find the right person. You wouldn't flippantly choose a babysitter for your kids. Treat your growth with the same kind of care.

And let's be clear: a coach isn't supposed to replace your therapist, friends, or mentors.

A coach is an addition to your village. Their role is to hold you accountable to the life you want, and help you grow into the person that life requires.

Who is that for you?

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Take care of yourself,