better work issue #17

​

😐 Why everything feels 'meh' lately

​

👋 Hey, it's Susan. Welcome to better work - a personal development newsletter for high-performers who put themselves first so that they can show up for the people they love.

​

There must be something in the air when everyone seems to feel meh at the same time.

Not depressed, not burned out, just flat. You’re going through the motions and still getting things done, but your motivation levels are at an all-time low.

Your first instinct is to be more productive or find more purposeful work.

🛑 But what if the problem isn’t that you’re not doing enough? What if you feel like your efforts don't matter anymore?

This meh feeling isn't about your job, but your relationship with work itself.

Today's issue isn't about forcing motivation or finding energy, but helping you feel like yourself again.

​

Read the full newsletter below.

↓

​

I have an on-again-off-again relationship with LinkedIn.

So when a casual post racked up dozens of reactions, including comments from second-degree connections, I knew I struck a chord.

​

When this many people on social media can agree on something, then something is up.

🪁 Is it something in the air?

🌚 Is Mercury in retrograde? (I still don't know what that means)

But the real [scary] question underneath it all → "Is it going to be like this forever?"

No one can answer that for you, but you can take comfort in knowing you're not alone.

Before we problem-solve our way out of this state, we need to understand this meh feeling.

Let's start by calling it by its government name: languishing.

​

I'm not OK, but I'm not not OK

The term languishing was popularized in 2021 by Adam Grant's article, There’s a Name for the Blah You’re Feeling: It’s Called Languishing.

Ahhhh 2021. 😷 We were deep in the throes of lockdown, courtesy of COVID-19. This was the perfect breeding ground for languishing because we were all stuck indoors.

Grant described languishing as the middle child of mental health; somewhere between depression and flourishing.

While this made sense during the global pandemic, we're still experiencing languishing years later.

What are we missing?

​

​

​

In Grant's TED Talk (a good alternative to his article if you don't have a paid New York Times account), he claimed that the antidote to languishing is flow.

🌊 Flow is activated by a combination of three elements: mastery, mindfulness, and mattering.

Most productivity and growth advice focuses on the first two.

Sharpen your skills! Be more present!

But over time, we can unknowingly slip back into languishing because we're missing the third element of flow ➡️ mattering.

Motivation and meaning stem from knowing that your efforts created some kind of ripple in the world. People need to know that what they do matters.

And the most obvious way to know that what you do matters is through feedback.

🔄 When the only feedback loop at work is your performance review, which results in a thumbs-up and a meager raise that doesn't outpace inflation, you start questioning everything.

Should I pivot? Take a career break? Start a business?

Before you blow up your career, you need to take your career off the pedestal.

We put way too much pressure on our jobs to provide purpose, mattering, and fulfillment. It’s like expecting your partner to be your best friend, your therapist, and a punching bag all at once.

We don't even realize we're putting this pressure on our jobs sometimes. We operate on inherited beliefs that "one" thing has to be our everything. But when we lose that one thing, we feel like we lost our identity.

This is what I call the identity blind spot - one of the four primary blockers that keep successful people feeling stuck despite all their achievements. To find what's holding you back without you knowing it, click here.

Since there's only so much you can control at work, we need to create space in our lives to experience mastery, mindfulness, and mattering.

We need multiple streams of flow.

​

Diversify your flow like an investment portfolio

You don't have to volunteer at a puppy shelter or start a non-profit saving puppies to find your flow (though it sounds adorbs).

There are places to access flow within your everyday life. Start with the things you've labeled as a "waste of time."

For example, Adam Grant found his flow playing Mario Kart with his family. That's right - an Ivy League professor with six best-selling books spent many evenings throwing turtle shells at his sister.

I surprised myself too. I found it in peeling garlic, baking bread, and wandering around a gallery.

🧄 There was something oddly satisfying about popping the peel off a garlic clove in one move. So I peeled a hundred more.

🍞 I didn't stop at bread. I baked biscuits and an olive oil cake all in the same day.

🖼️ I went to the National Portrait Gallery to sit in the courtyard and stare off into space for twenty minutes.

​

Wasn't this all a waste of time?

I could have bought peeled garlic and baked bread. I could have gotten some work done if I had brought my laptop to the gallery.

But it wasn't a waste of time because I decided it wasn't a waste of time.

My family and I enjoyed the garlic confit and baked goodies I made (high praise when a picky toddler actually eats your food). When I wandered around the National Portrait Gallery, I had mini-revelations about questions I was wrestling with all week.

These flow-like activities disrupted my daily routine in a good way. I needed a break from the status quo because my usual grounding practices weren't cutting it anymore.

Calling something a waste of time is a perception, not a truth. Same with being “too late” or “too early.”

You get to decide that you're on time and your time is well spent.

And it never hurts to have cake. 🍰

​

That's all from me today. A bit shorter than my usual issues, but that's because art imitates life - I've been focusing on finding flow and spending less time on a screen.

​

Thank you for reading.

🫡 See you on September 25th. Stay safe out there.

Take care of yourself,

Susan

Susan Lee

Career coach for high-performers

Founder of Hey Ms. Lee, LLC​

​

​

What did you think about today's newsletter? (❗Pick one THEN click "Submit" on the next page) 🤯 I NEEDED this! You read my mind. 🤔 It made me think in a good way. 🤓 Not my favorite but I enjoyed the read.

​

✌️ After Work

This is a bonus section where I share opportunities, recommendations, freebies, and funsies.

​

👐🏼 Got something to share?

Do you have an event, launch, or freebie that you want to share with the world? Let's feature it in better work!

Take this as a sign from the Universe that you shouldn't build alone.

Reply to this email and tell me more about it.

​

📥 Looking to grow your email list?

If you love my newsletter and you have an active newsletter on Kit, let's grow our email lists by recommending each other in the Creator Network.

👉 Reply with the word "kit."

Or are you ready to launch a newsletter? I recommend Kit! I've tried other platforms but ended up sticking with Kit for over three years. Get a 14-day free trial with my affiliate link (I have the Creator plan).